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Another Goodbye – Another Journey Begins

I will let this story unfold in its true form. Something so powerful it wouldn’t be fair not to share this with the world.

With permission of the author – thank you Justin!

“Well I did it. I have been here now for three months. It has been an interesting journey and with it brings a new chapter to my life moving forward.

I have been to treatment before, in fact three times prior, at different treatment centers in BC. The first two times were thirty days and the third was forty-five days. In my opinion, each place I had gone had treated their clients like children or presented them as individuals that should feel shame and guilt. They were mainly focused on the 12-step program, which I tried to get to grips with, but just could not accept what it was all about.

Coming here to the Sunshine Coast Health Centre was a whole different experience. One, which will stick with me. The way the program is run through meaning therapy and not beating you with a 12-step mentality and procedure. Although I do not dismiss that the 12 Steps works for some – it just didn’t work for me. The environment, program, staff, and clients have all been a great experience for me during my time here. Being here helped me with a multitude of issues from addiction to mental health to dealing with chronic reoccurring seizure activity that is still going through treatment to control. The Sunshine Coast Health Centre has opened up clarity, motivation, and passion for me.

I look at it like the acronym SAD, but rather than “I’m an addict” I see it not as
‘Seasonal affected disorder’ but SAD as a substance abuse disorder. I had a substance abuse disorder. I was an alcoholic and that is how I reflect on my past addiction. I am moving forward in my life and I don’t want to look back and do not want to be trapped in the stigma of being an ‘addict’. We were addicts, but we all realize that there is more to life through purpose and meaning. This is a large part of why we are all here right now. Being here at Sunshine Coast Health Centre is a giant diving board that as we jump on the board we gather knowledge, skills, support, meaning and purpose. As we depart from this bubble, off that diving board, we dive into a pool, which is life; and hope that we all dive into a pool of water and not an empty pool hitting rock bottom. This place is our springboard and what happens when we jump is up to us.

The true definition of addiction as we all know it is:

“The fact or condition of being addicted to a particular substance, thing, or activity”.

Addiction is a very serious problem in our society. We have been down a very dark road often trapped in a state of purgatory, fog, and despair. Once our addiction was a way of escape and soon it became a way of imprisonment and often torture.

That first step toward our recovery, in my opinion, is hope. Whether it’s in the dogged commitment of even one of our close friends or family member who tells us our life can be better and drives us to the rehab center, or the sheer possibility of a new tomorrow and another try at getting clean, hope can mean the difference between our recovery and relapse.
But if finding hope — and then keeping it alive — is essential to our recovery, what does that hope look like in our real life? It’s one thing to understand what hope is abstractly, and another thing to practice hope in daily life. Some things that helped me keep hope alive and that may help you all keep hope alive are:

  • Making a list of everything you are grateful for
  • Getting connected or reconnected
  • Finding purpose in your life and support in a community seeking the same thing
  • Listening to stories of hope and other people’s journeys
  • Visualizing a new sober you and always be gentle and kind to yourself and others

There was a song that was written and produced by a group called Røyksopp who are a Norwegian electronic music duo from Tromsø, Norway, that wrote a song called “What else is there”? This song resonates with me. It depicts a journey for me through my past addiction. Listening to the lyrics and watching the video can define many different meanings for each individual. I would strongly encourage people to take a listen and to watch this downtempo-ambient-electronic production. I have the lyrics to this song and would like to quickly share them with you for your own interpretation.”

What Else Is There

It was me on that road
But you couldn’t see me
Too many lights out, but nowhere near here

It was me on that road
Still you couldn’t see me
And then flashlights and explosions

Roads ends getting nearer
We cover distance but not together
I am the storm and I am the wonder
And the flashlights, nightmares
And sudden explosions

I don’t know what more to ask for
I was given just one wish

It’s about you and the sun
A morning run
The story of my maker
What have I and what I ache for

I’ve got a golden ear
I cut and I spear
And what else is there
Roads and getting nearer
We cover distance still not together

If I am the storm if I am the wonder
Will I have flashlights, nightmares
And sudden explosions

There is no room where I can go and
You’ve got secrets too

I don’t know what more to ask for
I was given just one wish

To share what things will look like for me moving forward I have this to say about my new forthcoming chapters:

When I get home…

I will be seeing my General Practioner to get referrals set up for continuing care of a psychiatrist, psychologist and most importantly, for me, a life coach. I have a list of local SMART meetings in my area. I am fortunate that there are no shortages of SMART meetings. Making sure I keep connected and reconnecting with my family and friends. I have school starting in the first week of February. I have been accepted into the Primary Care Paramedic program transferring my education, experience and skills from being a social worker combining it with being a paramedic and then advancing into the advanced care paramedic.

I also have aligned myself to do volunteer work for St. Johns Ambulance with their branches located in the lower mainland. Updating my medical certifications and acquiring new certifications in order to jump into the full-time programming as a paramedic. School for me will be at the Justice Institute of British Columbia located in Vancouver.

I will also be getting back into writing, producing, and engineering music in the genres of progressive house, progressive trance, dubstep and ambient to name a few. I have rekindled relations in the music industry that I have been involved with from early days of being a DJ to music production abroad in Europe, the Asia and South Americas. This coming summer I will be heading over to the United Kingdom to be a part of some very large world-renowned festivals. These are just some of things that are solid and ready to go through my pipeline moving forward.

Thank you all.

Checking Out!”

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